Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Newborn Photos

The week after Marshall was born, our good friend Natalie did some photos of me and the babe. She did a fabulous job! I have no idea which ones are my favorites, since there are so many great ones! I'm so happy I now have these photos to cherish - since my little guy seems to have grown so much already in the 2 weeks since these photos were taken!

Thanks so much to Natalie for doing these photos! : )




















Monday, July 4, 2011

Birth Story

Warning *Birth Story*

Long-winded, so don't say I didn't warn you.....

So my original due date was June 27th. As I stated on this blog before - I was more than a little irritated that I went past my due date - since the doctors had me thinking since 29 weeks that I would be induced much much earlier. Anyway - I had my weekly ultrasound scheduled for the 28th and was planning to see my doc the next day on the 29th. At my ultrasound I was informed the amniotic fluid level was at 3.8 and the placenta looked like crap (under 5 for fluid is risky). The tech and specialist doc said there was no reason to wait one more day to have this baby. I was then taken through a back door from the antepartem testing center (where my ultrasound was) right to labor and delivery. I was a little nervous, since I was expecting to go home after my appointment and I hadn't even showered yet that day, and my bag was at home and I wasn't at all prepared for what was coming.

I was admitted to labor and delivery around 4:45pm on Tuesday - and after a long Non-Stress Test they determined I was okay to be induced, versus a c-section. Because the fluid was so low - they had to monitor the baby closely for a long time to determine if he would be fine to wait entering this world through labor/birth and not c-section. Luckily the babe was perfect on all the monitors. So I was given a suppository of cytotec to "ripen my cervix" at 630pm on Tuesday and was told the plan for the evening was "to get some rest" and that I would be given pitocin in the morning. Well, at 11:30pm I was in full blown labor. I woke Will up at 12:30am because my contractions were just too painful to endure alone anymore and I had been timing them and they were all 3-4 min apart. We spent the entire morning hours with me walking around and leaning into Will and grabbing his hands every time I had a contraction, which was about every 3-4 minutes still. I was 4 cm dilated by 4am (I was not dilated at all when I got there). They determined I wouldn't need pitocin at all, and just let me do my thing instead. At 8am they convinced me to let them break my water. I told them no prior - because they told me my contractions would be worse - and they were already bad ... I couldn't imagine them being worse. But anyway - I was stuck at 8cm dilated - and they told me it would go faster if they broke my water. The next hour sucked so so much. Every contraction I felt like I needed to push, but I couldn't because I wasn't dilated to a 10 yet. Every contraction I would scream for the nurse to come check to see if I was at a 10 yet, because the pain was just awful. Finally, at 9:20 am I was told to start pushing. With no epidural, it was pretty intense. After nearly 1 hour of pushing (because my contractions weren't close enough together for it to go very fast) Marshall entered this world at 10:16am.

Will cried a lot, and where I thought I would cry a ton - I really didn't. I think I was in too much shock. I tore .... a lot. Then to make matters worse - my placenta wouldn't come out on its own. Since it was so calcified, it was still stuck to the wall or something like that. After 30 min. I was told the doctor would have to reach in and get it or that it would need to be surgically removed if she couldn't get it out. The pain of her reaching in to get it was just as bad as birth - and she told me that ahead of time. Luckily it was only for a minute or so - but man that sucked bad. Then they found some more tears way up, and they gave me the choice of enduring more intense pain by them stitching them up in the delivery room - or I could go to the O.R. and have it taken care of. After the mass amounts of pain that I had already endured - I chose to get a spinal and go to the O.R. Rather ironic, considering I had just endured a natural birth just to get an epidural anyway. At least it didn't affect the baby since he was already out. They kept calling me the "vaginal c-section" for all the crap I went through.

The worst part of the entire process was being away from my baby for 2+ hours after delivering him. I never really got to hold him before I was whisked away to the O.R. - where I was for about an hour, then another hour in the recovery room. They kept telling me "not to worry about the baby - that he was fine and your husband is with him" but I kept stressing about breastfeeding and bonding because I read that I should do that as soon as possible after delivery. Finally, after so long I was finally reunited with my son in the recovery room, but I couldn't hold him yet - I had to wait until I was moved to my post delivery room. I was numb from my hips down for the rest of the day too, so that was uncomfortable too.

Overall, the entire experience kinda sucked. My son is obviously, definitely worth all of it .... but honestly, next time I'll probably get an epidural. They say you forget all the pain after the baby is born - but I'm still dealing with the pain. I'm on percocet and lots of ibuprofen, thankfully. Things are getting better pain-wise, but really, there is no way I'd like to go through this again for quite some time. I'm thinking 3-4 years before we even think about having another. That was already the plan, but this birth definitely reiterated that for me.

Let me say it again, I love my son so so so much and am so very grateful for him. I just didn't expect natural birth to be so, well, painful.

I also love my husband so so so much. I needed him entirely so during the entire process and he was there for me when things were really hard. I appreciate him letting me lean on him, literally and figuratively. I love you, Will. Thanks for being so wonderful. <3

I am so happy Marshall is such a healthy baby. He really made the whole process worth it. I would do it again for him in a heartbeat, just probably with an epidural. :)

Marshall James Brawn

Welcome Marshall James Brawn! He was welcomed into this world at 10:16am on June 29th, 2011. He was 7 lbs 11 oz. and 19-3/4 in. long. After a very difficult (natural) labor/birth - we are so happy he is finally here! We love him so much and are so grateful for him. I will document his birth story later - but for the sake of family living far away, I need to get these photos up! I believe these photos speak for themselves, and no captions are needed. Enjoy the small portion of photos that we have taken thus far of our little guy. Again, we love him so much! <3